Solving Problematic Sexual Behavior with the Six Principles of Sexual Health
At Kimberly Keiser & Associates, sex therapy is our primary focus and expertise.
One component of sex therapy we are excited to offer is The Harvey Institute’s Out of Control Sexual Behavior model (OCSB). We had the pleasure of working with Doug Braun-Harvey, who has graciously trained members of Kimberly Keiser & Associates in his approach to working with problematic sexual behavior.
We will provide a brief overview of this structured model, but will primarily focus on a key component used in the model: the six principles of sexual health.
Focusing Behaviors on Sexual Health
What sets the OCSB model apart from other approaches?
In the OCSB model, the focus is on sexual health, and while we do set boundaries, the primary focus is on recognizing what sexual behaviors are problematic, setting realistic expectations, as well as turning our focus and behaviors toward sexual health.
What is sexual health? That is where the six principles come into play, as they are the guiding force behind the formation of each individual’s sexual health plan.
The Six Principles of Sexual Health
Consent. Consent is essential in any sexual relationship and is the first sexual health principle for a reason. At its core, it is essential for each partner to experience sex free of coercion and violence. However, consent can become twisted when we talk about sex. (This short video perfectly illustrates consent.)
Non-exploitive. A sexually exploitive relationship is one using a sexual relationship to advance a personal agenda, at the expense of someone else. These situations are hurtful and problematic in any relationship and these themes should be looked at carefully to help turn toward health and healing for those involved.
Protection from HIV, STIs, and Pregnancy. This principle is focused on guarding oneself and any sexual partner against known and unknown STIs, HIV, as well as pregnancy. Important questions to ask are:
Do you know your relationship with HIV and STIs?
What’s your contraception plan?
Honesty. This principle ties in with each and every other principle, and if this is not present, we are most likely moving into an unhealthy area. Breaches in honesty within a relationship, especially when dealing with sex, are devastating and take time and effort to recover from. As we strive toward health, we work to foster open communication about sexual desires, fantasies, and feelings, as this is a key ingredient to enjoying fulfilling sex and intimacy.
Shared Values. This principle can be very different depending on the person. As long as one’s answer does not conflict with the other principles, it is important to honor this as an important part of an individual's upbringing and belief system. A great way to reflect on this is to answer the following questions:
What does having sex mean to you?
How did you develop these values?
Are these values compatible with your partner’s values?
Mutual Pleasure. Whether we are talking about individual sexual pleasure, a new relationship, or a long-term commitment, it is important to remember good sex is more than a series of precise maneuvers; it has the potential to promote growth and integration of heart, body, mind, and spirit.
These six principles of sexual health are an essential component in the OCSB model and create the backbone of one’s sexual health plan. Despite these aspects being critical to the OCSB model, they are just a portion of this model that has created healing and happiness for many.
Learn How OCSB Can Benefit You
If you would like to learn more about sexual health and how these principles can fit into your life, reach out to our team for more information.
We can incorporate OCSB principles into any of our Sioux Falls therapy services, and we would love to see how our counseling methods could help change your life for the better.